


Push Push

by ledbythreads



Series: Heart in your hand [1]
Category: Led Zeppelin
Genre: 1969, Band Fic, Canon Compliant, Canon Era, Canon Timeline, Eventual Smut, First Time, Love On Tour, M/M, One True Pairing, POV Robert, Porn With Plot, RPF, RPS - Freeform, Slash, Smut, True Love, dyslexia sans beta
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-26
Updated: 2019-08-03
Packaged: 2020-07-19 23:55:52
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 5,295
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19982659
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ledbythreads/pseuds/ledbythreads
Summary: A year before Bron-Yr-Aur Robert and Jimmy first get it on - really they hardly know each other, yet.edit 03/08/2019 - This takes place during Led Zeppelin's second US tour in California around May 1st. Beltaine. It is work in progress and I now think it will have 5 chapters of which 5 are posted, so it just needs mixing down. Thank you to the beautiful support this story has received - it was written with devotion, fascination, and love.





	1. Dawning

Robert loves these times recently, when Jimmy comes to him. They have gigs most nights and parties after, but somehow Jimmy has started to make time to seek Robert out. Zeppelin are working on material for the second album, and Robert knows some nights Jimmy is away in a nearby studio, alone doing his alchemy.  
Robert feels light with Jimmy here, feels optimistic as a dandelion. ‘Jimmypagejimmypageypage' he thinks. Christ, he's such a fan sometimes.  
Jimmy is a better listener at night, Robert thinks. At night they talk musical ideas, and books, and life. The sounds of their entourage fading into the background. Jimmy sitting buddha style, Robert sprawling, or jumping up to bring Jimmy notes, or a book, or a photograph. Robert rarely doubts that he will be loved by somebody, or even most people, but he isn't sure of Jimmy yet.

Tonight. This morning rather, it must be after 6am. The low light of Robert’s room starting to be touched by the beginnings of dawn over Sunset strip. Jimmy uncurls himself to stand looking out the full-length windows.  
"Hail unto thee who art Ra in thy rising" Jimmy says seemingly to no one in particular  
"Eh?," Robert says, slinking over to stand in Jimmy's presence.  
"Oh.. Just a thing to greet the new day" Jimmy says "It's the same sun wherever we are, see?"  
Robert understands. He loves when Jimmy takes him seriously about things they have in common.  
"Yes" "It's also May Day today" Robert offers  
"Girls in the local villages used to get up early like this to wash their faces in the dew, to bring them lovers"  
Jimmy nods but goes strangely quiet. Robert's sure he's correct, maybe May Day is a bit too prosaic for Jimmy.  
Robert doesn't mind, just knows he likes standing here with Jimmy like this.  
Jimmy seems to come to some sort of internal decision. "May Day, yes, Beltaine" Jimmy says, and his voice is a little thicker.

Jimmy puts a flat hand on Roberts belly. Under his shirt. First it feels like a question. Then it feels like a test.  
Jimmy is silent. His eyes shaded. Robert feels a first flush of heat with curiosity but then it quickly becomes unbearable that Jimmy is so still. Robert wants to smile and make a joke of it but it's like all the blood has flooded from his head to pulse behind Jimmy's palm.  
‘Is this real?’ he thinks.  
"Ask me" Jimmy murmurs as though he heard. 

"Touch me" Robert says. Then panics. What if he's got this all wrong?  
'ohmygodohmygodwhatanidiot'  
Jimmy looks up, pupils blown black, and Robert knows then. Knows he's read the runes correctly. Knows the gates will open.  
"Where?" Jimmy says. His hand still exactly where he's placed it.  
Robert feels like this is the most wanton thing anyone has ever said to him. Ever.

'ohmygodohmygodohmygod' thinks Robert 'Jimmypagejimmypage'  
He can't, 'Ohmygodcan't' He can't possibly say, "my cock" he says, astonished.  
"Jimmy"  
"shhh"

Jimmy, still not moving his right hand off Robert's belly, uses his left to unbuckle Robert's leather belt and unzip his jeans. Robert can hardly bear how untouched he feels. Jimmy just widens his stance and lightly cups Robert's erection.  
"ask me" Jimmy says again, so quietly.

"Unh, J..immy" Robert stutters.  
Jimmy looks back implacably. But Robert sees a blush under his pale skin, senses some shift in Jimmy's control and it gives him courage.  
"suck it" Robert says. 

Jimmy kneels, grabs the waistband of Robert's jeans in his left hand, brings down his right hand to brace against the base of Robert's penis and slowly takes him into his mouth.  
Robert wants to bury his hands in Jimmy's hair, but he's not sure if that's what you do with another man. So, he hugs his own chest instead, trying to stay upright.  
Jimmy's right hand holds his hips back and Robert wants to weep and moan from how helpless and full and blessed he feels. Jimmy controls the rhythm, sucking alternately shallow then deep, making the bottom fall out of Robert's stomach, grazing him lightly with his teeth then soothing him with a steady tongue. Then Jimmy lets go of his jeans and slips his left hand round to cup the dip of Robert's back, and Robert feels so undone by this small tenderness that he's losing it, falling towards orgasm too quickly.  
"Uh, Uhn" "wanna come" "Jimmy..?"  
Feels Jimmy's hand push push pushing him on, deeper, giving him a 'yes', and his knees are giving out and he's coming and Jimmy's helping him stay standing, and he's seeing stars. Then it's over and Jimmy is up full body against him, holding him while he's shaking, chest to chest.  
Jimmy kisses him for the first time, tongue pushing open Robert's mouth, kissing his seed back to him. Robert finally brings his arms round Jimmy and they are lost in kissing each other. Robert can feel how hard Jimmy is against his hip and he feels a small glow of accomplishment.  
Then Jimmy pulls away, cups Robert's face in his palm. "shhh" Jimmy says softly. Runs a thumb over Robert's bottom lip. Then turns and walks out. Doesn't look back.


	2. Gully

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "If I can't see the sky I'm going to become jaded"

"Scuse me" Robert sootches in too "budge up"  
"Robert, move your beautiful arse, darlin"  
"Fuck off G"  
"Ow alright" G concedes "go on then mate what you waitin for" to the driver. 

"Jesus that was, god, heavy, how many in there? Five fucking encores, fuck, my head is.." Robert chatters  
"One might think perhaps a tad zealous on the matter of ticket sales" Jimmy opines looking at G pointedly  
"Only got *your* interests in my humble heart, Mr Page" G jests.  
"Peter? Bless you one and all" Jimmy laughs fondly

They pull round the back of Crawford hall, the headlight picking out some pairs fighting, some it appears, fucking.  
Robert starts to wind the window down.  
"Whatcha doin Rob?"  
"Pardon me for breathing luv - I'm fucking toast"  
"Somewhat Bacchanalian, our revels" Jimmy says  
"Bach what?" Robert grins "Who mentioned Jonesy?"  
"Very droll" "He can of course, play Bach"  
"I know, I said it with love"  
"You say everything with love Robert, you're indiscriminate"  
Robert, finally silent, catches Jimmy's gaze - holds it for several heartbeats  
"I'm really not" Robert says at last

....

"Where's he going?" Robert asks G, chin to the driver  
"Where's he going? To the fucking strip, man" "We've Pasadena tomorrow"  
"Aww no G not tonight" Robert whines "I need to see... I dunno… a proper, *tree* or something, not back to the box"  
"Rob, we haven't got time for you to be poncing round like a facking elf" smiles G "plenty of Roses and Daisys back at the ranch"  
"If I can't see the sky I'm going to become jaded" Robert mock sulks "Come on Geee, arranging is your thing, man, Jimeee? Jimmy?"  
"Why dincha go *hiking* yesterday you daft twat?"  
"We were... working on stuff…Jimmy and me"  
"It's not altogether a bad idea" Jimmy says suddenly bright. "Sam? it is Sam? Sam, where might we find Mr Plant a tree?"  
"Yes sir, Sam, what kind of tree sir?  
"He's a Page not a Knight" Robert pipes up, nobody else laughing he cackles to himself "heeeeee"  
"Nature mate, you know, a bit of verdant pasture, like not freeway, scenic" G unhelpfully interprets  
"Sure, Sure, Sir... I mean guys - There's Buck Gully just back theways, the coast but like, mellow?"  
"Sounds like somewhere one gets shot" Jimmy bounces the decision to Robert  
"Anywhere" Robert sighs "and somebody give me some weed, Christ"  
"How'm I gonna let the crew know?" G huffs "facking telephone them?"  
"The crew are fine. And Bonzo won't notice and Jonesy won't care" Robert says  
"Bonzo will notice, Rob, Bonz will think you are being slain by some dolls for being a dick"  
"Well, send him a ransom note G, make a few quid" "See, this is why I need a quiet night"

....

Feeling the air change Robert hauls himself out to sit in the car window, chagrined but grateful G keeps hold of his legs. The waxing gibbous moon, only a day from full, can finally be seen laying down her silks across the water as the ocean comes into view. The wind from the speeding car clears his head and Robert finally starts to feel nervous, or at least a little shaky, about how seductive this detour might turn out in reality. He hadn't consciously planned this trip because of Jimmy, Robert reasons, but if he's honest with himself it's Jimmy he wants.

All day Jimmy has treated him in exactly the same way as the last weeks. Interested, uninterested, somewhat like he's listening to someone else as well as Robert, and then listening to Robert like they are the last two people on earth. Robert has used up gallons of his deep pool of optimism rationalising Jimmy's sudden departure this morning as an eccentricity, no odder and certainly just as delightfully excusable as giving reality-shattering blowjobs to your bandmates. The feel of G's hands gripping his knees suddenly feels like the wrong hands as Robert remembers.  
“Fuuck!” Robert shouts at the night. ‘Ask me’ he hears Jimmy answer in memory and his own tongue feels slick in his mouth, and his groin hitches uncomfortably.  
On stage Robert’s feelings had been inescapable, but on stage he is freed to feel. Singing I Can’t Quit You Baby, Robert had felt so unbalanced that his timing was more off kilter than usual. But the sounds coming out of him. The song coming through was amazing and vast, liquid and profound.  
Together, Jimmy and Robert have had incredible chemistry from day one, they all four have, but tonight Robert feels John’s drumming riding him; Jonsey holding him up; but his call and response with Jimmy feels on the cusp of something both profane and holy. ‘I’m gonna give him everything I’ve got to give’ Robert muses, knowing he’s quietly promised this to Jimmy weeks before Jimmy ever laid hands on him. 

....

The guy drives the car down a track that peters out and crunches to a stop. Jimmy slinks himself out of the other window and elegantly hops to the ground like he's in a show on TV. Robert wishes he'd thought of this, but G unceremoniously opens his door with Robert still in it.  
"Move yerself Rob"  
"Oi whatsis, Sam, you can carry this an all"  
Refreshment being a prerequisite for any Zeppelin activity G soon has the guy clanking off with a crate of bottles towards the sea. Jimmy looking strangely guitarless saunters at the front. Robert lights a fag and brings up the rear wondering what he's got himself into with the world’s two most unlikely chaperones.  
Down at the beach Robert start to relax, the driver is not exactly a hippy but not a straight either. Although he is displaying a welcome amount of being starstruck he is also capable and has the American charm of being able to be personable even if unsure of what he is really doing there. Robert puts together a driftwood fire and G unnecessarily gets it raring with some particularly volatile brandy.  
Everything is lovely, moon, sea, stars, and as much sexual energy as a church fete. Robert resigns himself to getting as stoned as possible - it's a beautiful night.  
….

G is sleeping like a glorious walrus, hands folded giving the impression of wearing a waistcoat he doesn't have on. Sam and Jimmy are chatting about pleasantries in low voices and Robert has been drifting. Burning, light filled images of this morning, and of the gig, entwining with cool ethereal fancies as Dylan and the Byrds alternately sing about the smoke rings of his mind. Too much grass has been a bad idea. Robert rouses himself, girds his loins. ‘Jimmyjimmycomeonjimmy’ he whispers inwardly.  
Robert stands above the low fire, across from Jimmy, and stretches indolently, shakes back his hair, then kneels and blows carefully on the embers three times. He rises back slowly onto his haunches when the flames catch, and without preamble rises and walks out of the circle of firelight. 

Robert has counted 53 breaths before he hears Jimmy behind him. Realizes he's cut the skin of his palms digging his nails in. Realizes he is tremoring. Feels suddenly like a king crowned in relief and joy. He waits.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In which the author begs forgiveness from the good people of California for any eccentricity of speech Sam displays, and notes that Mr Peter Grant has assumed the tones of Alfie Solomans. Robert says fuck a lot - at this point I feel he has reason to do so. I don't know how well the Zep references work - but I like to write up against known events. I even checked if you could get down this road in 1969 - all errors are my own. Work in Progress, feel free to participate and critique.


	3. Waves

Robert can hear Jimmy picking his way over stones, being careful in the poor light. He feels the place on his belly where Jimmy first touched him this morning, like a scalded handprint. For all his swagger Robert is not certain he can trust his instincts. Feels that even though Jimmy has followed him, his charms lie scattered along the beach. 

Robert stops and stands half on to Jimmy, facing the waves. He looks now to Jimmy closing the distance between them and all he can see are the angles of his spare frame in his long tweed coat that looks like folded wings. Robert shivers slightly in the little t-shirt he'd put on after the show.  
The moon is approaching the zenith giving everything an MGM celluloid sheen. Jimmy is smoking a joint and the glowing ember as Jimmy inhales feels like the only warm thing in the world to Robert. Silently Jimmy comes to a stop by Robert, close, but no closer than is usual. He passes the joint to Robert and as their fingertips graze it is like the scene flips from negative to colour. Robert just knows, feels that thread pull between them.

Robert inhales deeply from the joint and steps right into Jimmy's aura. Looping an arm loosely round Jimmy's neck leans in as though to kiss him. Slowly lets out a curl of smoke so Jimmy can breathe it in. One long breath in. Jimmy exhales. Robert feeling like he is losing his mind, kisses Jimmy for real, all purpose, all deliberation gone, just feeling, like smoke rolling over them.  
Robert kisses like Jimmy is saving his life, Jimmy kisses Robert back like he is hauling himself up a hillside. Jimmy presses in so close to Robert that Robert can feel the flaring of Jimmy's diaphragm against his chest. Jimmy's concave stomach glowing warm against him.  
Robert, beyond shame, picks Jimmy up and clutches at his ass, his back - kissing him all the while in awkward dis-coordination. For want of something he can fuck Jimmy against, Robert tips them both to the ground, grinding against Jimmy in the dirt.

"Jimmy...JimmyJimmy"  
crooning out loud now the things he has kept silent  
"Fuck Jimmy, I didn't... god Jimmy... I wasn't sure..I'm .. god"  
Kissing Jimmy's throat, his face. His beautiful mouth. Rocking while Jimmy wraps his legs like vines around Robert's thighs, buries his hands in Robert's hair.  
"I am I am I am"  
Jimmy singsongs against Robert's face as they buck together. Robert can feel Jimmy's need and his own annealing something in them, making it permanent.

"Robert, Robert, stop, Robert" Jimmy says stunning him.  
Robert stops like he might get whiplash, all senses alert. Jimmy understands suddenly his mistake.  
"No, I only... Robert I want you. I want to tell you that I want you"  
Robert, now painfully aware of Jimmy's erection throbbing against his own, feels this is information that could have waited. But Robert also understands somewhere inside his lust that this is Jimmy Page. His Jimmy Page, for this moment anyway, and people must be who they are. Robert softens, slows, and he takes Jimmy's hand. Kisses his palm, kisses the web of his thumb, sucks each calloused fingertip.

"Let me touch you Pagey" Robert asks "let me"  
Jimmy's eyes say yes but Robert hesitates  
"I want you to..., please Jimmy, ask me" Robert begs  
Robert feels Jimmy going glassy under him.  
Jimmy whispers "I want, uh, I want you to make me.." Jimmy trails off.  
"Ok, It’s ok" Robert soothes "Pagey,… it’s ok" 

Robert scuffs the more obvious stones out of their way. Starts to find Jimmy out all over again by touch. Consciously Robert makes all his own anxiety ebb away, lets his natural glow through for Jimmy. He feels for the warmth of Jimmy’s armpits under his coat, wraps them up in it together.  
Still lying between Jimmy's legs Robert now takes most of his weight on his hip, starts to slowly circle his hands up from Jimmy's stomach over his chest, along his sides, across his throat, down to his belly. Robert feels Jimmy start to sink into this touch, feels like he is putting Jimmy back together in the dark. Piece by piece Robert feels Jimmy out, and when Jimmy's breath starts to catch again, then circles lower. As he feels the hair trailing down to Jimmy's crotch and the gutters of his stomach, and the flare of his hip bones Robert is aware of how much a man Jimmy is despite his air of frailty. 

Robert wonders at how unraveled he feels, how beautiful he finds the strange angular guitarist whose body is so different from his own. He hooks Jimmy's legs against him and shuffle-kneels to shifts them both so he can pull Jimmy upright into his lap. Robert doesn't want Jimmy tranced-out, he wants him right here with him.  
"Jimmymate look at me"  
There's just enough moonlight to see into Jimmy's eyes. Robert holds his gaze as he cups Jimmy's crotch for the first time with his hand. Feels the heat like he is touching himself. Is amazed how hungry Jimmy makes him feel. How close to the edge. Robert holds Jimmy's gaze as he palms him harder. Opens Jimmy's fly. Reaches in and holds Jimmy's cock. Feels Jimmy with him finally - a cone of attention bearing down on Robert.  
"Jimmy you're beautiful" he says. 

Feels Jimmy's cock answer in his hand, feels them tip into the rock and roll of response. The riff kicks back in. Robert tries to take the beat between them, wants to wank Jimmy like Jimmy makes him feel on stage. Wants to give it up, give it back. Robert feels like he can hear Jimmy now. 'Hey... Oh... Hey' It's Robert that needs cooling.  
It's hard for Robert to keep any steady rhythm between them, he feels ungainly with want, but then Jimmy's starts to thrust into Robert's hand and Robert answers and echoes Jimmy's lead. Jimmy starts to make low noises in his throat, a sort of humming. 

Robert bends to suck Jimmy's nipple, fighting the urge to bite him or just push him down on his back again. Jimmy hisses and groans. His nipples more sensitive than most women, Robert thinks. Robert is nearly gasping now at how this simple thing makes Jimmy writhe. Jimmy has hooked his knees back to give himself more purchase, rising out of Robert's lap, fucking Robert's fist.  
Robert grabs Jimmy's ass again with his free hand, all his smooth moves useless against this syncopated chaotic thing they are inventing together. Robert can't believe how turned on he is by something so graceless, but the rawness flips him inside out. Jimmy is starting to keen. Robert, suddenly aware how near they are to where the others are, realises he honestly doesn't give a fuck. Just. Wants. This. Now.

"Come for me... Jimmy? come for me?" Robert pleads.  
"Unh, I am. I. yes." Jimmy says between his teeth.  
He drops down into Robert's lap again, rocking his hips, while Robert strokes his cock harder, more insistently. Jimmy pulls Robert into an open mouthed, teeth knocking, tongue sucking kiss and comes over Robert's chest, over Robert's hand, with a deep, short, bass "Oh" of completion.  
Jimmy doesn't fade out as Robert expects but is. Absolutely. Totally. Just, there-present. Exhilarated.  
Grabs Robert by the hair and kisses him again grinning, laughing.  
"Thank you. Robert, thank you"


	4. Soaked

"Gosh," Jimmy laughs "you're soaked."  
Robert's teeth are starting to chatter and he's not sure if it's because of his clammy t-shirt or some sweet kind of shock.  
"S' alright" Robert grins and ineffectually wipes at Jimmy's cum with his hand, then realising he can't wipe it in the sand, instead wipes it down his jeans.  
Jimmy laughs again at Robert  
"Nature child.” Jimmy chides “Here you are."  
Jimmy hands Robert a surprisingly large silk handkerchief or more likely a scarf from his coat pocket, and shrugs off the coat itself to drape it round Robert's shoulders.  
"Better?" Jimmy asks gallantly.  
"Better." Robert agrees, wipes his hands on the scarf, doesn't want to give it back to Jimmy. Wants it because it's Jimmy. But stuffs it into a pocket of the coat.

Jimmy pushes Roberts hair back with two hands, kisses him softly with lips that still feel swollen. It's the first time they have kissed like this, without urgency, and Robert feels like it might all be ok. Whatever 'all' might be. For the first time with Jimmy he feels the kind of grounded calm he feels with Maureen. Thinking of them both, Maureen and Jimmy, at the same time feels strangely serene to Robert, and he accepts the feeling, as he accepts most new knowledge about himself, with relaxed curiosity. 

Maybe picking up on Roberts change of focus, Jimmy deepens their kiss, exploring Roberts mouth and catching his bottom lip in teasing bites. Robert feels how long he has been hard for, and he starts to consciously ache again for Jimmy. Feels the dark red pressure between his legs.  
"Let's move on a bit shall we," Jimmy suggests "see where this goes?"  
Jimmy unfolds himself off Roberts lap but must help Robert stand because Robert's legs have cramped from kneeling. Jimmy pulls Robert up by the hand and then keeps his fingers laced through Robert's in a way that feels more intimate than kissing.  
They start out east to go further along the beach and Jimmy drops Roberts hand as he strides gingerly out in front. Robert stuffs his empty hands into Jimmy's coat pockets, balls the silk square against his palm. 

The light is starting to change once again, and Robert thinks that it has been one whole day since Jimmy first touched him as a lover. The word feels awkward, but Robert cannot think of another to say what he has become. Is becoming.  
They come to a stream flowing down to the sea, a little silver ribbon of a thing. They turn north to walk along it, saying little but reassuring murmurs, Jimmy picking out the way as it becomes rockier. Robert feels like Jimmy is leading him into a dream - further and further away from a world where managers and drivers wait among empty bottles to spirit them away from one show to the next.  
A little colour is coming back into the world as Jimmy leads Robert higher up the rocks, moving more confidently now it's possible to see where they are going. It's an easy climb and Robert enjoys Jimmy's coat swishing behind him like a cloak and the feel of his muscles moving with a grace that feels newborn.  
They reach a wide ledge about a hundred feet above the beach - just high enough to get a sense of scale. Robert reaches the same level as Jimmy and, now warm, hands him back his coat.  
"Can I?" Robert asks gesturing with the scarf.  
"Of course," Jimmy smiles. Robert doesn't think he's ever seen Jimmy this present in his body before.  
Robert still hesitates to touch Jimmy, so he ties the scarf round his neck for something to do, to stop him reaching out. Nibbles one of the ends distractedly.  
"Look." Jimmy says and turns Robert round by the hips so he's facing the first edge of the rising sun with Jimmy at his back.  
Robert leans against Jimmy who rests his chin against Robert's shoulder. Jimmy's arms snake around Robert and hold him.  
Robert soaks in the new sensation of Jimmy's hips against his ass, and Jimmy all along him from his calves to his shoulderblades. He pushes back against Jimmy like a foal against its mother. 

Jimmy lays his hands over Robert's hands - and slowly trails their joined right hands down to Robert's sex.  
"Show me how you want it." Jimmy softly says, rocking just a little bit against Robert. Swaying.  
Robert is only a little aroused physically, but that deep pressure is still there for Jimmy to kindle easily. Jimmy's left hand wanders up to thumb Roberts nipple slowly, casually. The heel of his hand notched against Robert's breastbone.  
"Give it to me." Jimmy encourages.  
Long fingers loosely following the curve of Robert's hand as he takes hold of himself and starts to stroke. Robert strokes long, holding his cock like he holds his mic, with his thumb higher to catch the head and press on each upstroke. Jimmy follows with his hand, sensing what Robert is doing.  
"In Copenhagen," Jimmy says "I thought of you like this. I wanted you then Robert"  
Robert feels what he can only describe as swooning. Jimmy's voice, Jimmy's secrets are making him delirious. If he's not careful he will come just because of something unexpected Jimmy says.  
Robert keeps on deeply stroking himself, so utterly familiar and yet possessed by Jimmy, like maybe it's Jimmy in his hand again, or maybe his hand is Jimmy's mouth. Everything is melting and golden and the sun is bright in that way it only ever is on rising. A gold coin being lifted out of the ocean.  
"I wanted you then. I wanted you as the spring came. I've waited for you, Robert" Jimmy continues.  
Robert loves his name in Jimmy’s mouth.  
Jimmy slips his hand down to cup Robert's balls, still pressing up against his backside. Robert is wordless, but he's starting to gasp and call out, raggedly, not performing for Jimmy, just unable to stop. Jimmy brings his hand up and stops Robert's. Jimmy holds Robert’s hand still like a high extended note ringing out.  
"Easy, easy." Jimmy croons "Let me see you"  
Jimmy circles round while Robert pants, catching his breath. Jimmy stands in front of Robert now, both hands on his shoulders, his left leg a little forward, braced. Robert's nostrils are flaring as he tries to be what Jimmy needs to see. Robert grins and shakes back his hair. Accepts the challenge.  
"Ok Pagey, Ok" he says, leans and kisses Jimmy's wrist, then head back, sun on his face, Robert starts to make himself come.  
Leaning onto Jimmy's hands Robert can just feel an intense wave of being watched. There could be a thousand people on the beach and Robert would still feel Jimmy watching him most keenly.  
"Ok, alrightalright" Robert speeds, wanking fast, like being the kid he almost still is.  
Robert can hear Jimmy mewling, can hear the hum in his outbreaths, the catch in his inbreaths. Robert feels he has to get there before Jimmy stops him again or he might die. The red pressure is changing, flowing up from his feet, flowing up from the land. Green now, fecund, rich and alive. Robert is grinning and laughing like a champagne bottle that's been knocked over.  
And he's coming like some sort of ridiculous miracle, and Jimmy is laughing, grabbing him into a hug. And Robert is trying to come into his hand, so he doesn't come on Jimmy's lovely coat. And Robert is hanging onto Jimmy and they are spinning each other round. Young, alive, arrogant, magically together.


	5. Stone

Robert sits down on the ground smiling up at Jimmy. Everything is the same, everything is different. Robert thinks that fucking about with Jimmy is maybe not the most surprising thing that has happened to him lately, but it's definitely top ten. This whole thing, Zeppelin, America, has gone from anything is possible to everything is possible so quickly it gets hard to think about head on.

"That was..." Robert begins "Far out... fuck Jimmy... Jesus"

Robert searches his pockets for a cigarette. Takes out a crumpled pack and looking at it thinks this is just about how he must look to Jimmy. Ruined.

"You want one?" Robert offers

“Sure.” Jimmy replies takes two and lights them. Jimmy passes one back to Robert, who recognizes the move as his own, sucks on the filter aware again of Jimmy's lips. Jimmy perches on a rock, looking like a grey crow. Robert feels like Jimmy might fly away and doesn't know what to feel about it.

"We need to get back" Jimmy says through wisps of smoke. "Rose Palace only sent partial specs through, and anyway the acoustics might be tricky regardless"

"What about press?" Robert asks "G said Paul Newman is coming maybe"

As they talk shop, Robert feels the words shape themselves to fill in the spaces where they might say other things to each other. And though he doesn't know quite what he would say to Jimmy, Robert feels the moment slipping away with regret. 

They climb back down to the beach and Robert has the feeling that something subtle about the world is closed and folded away on itself. Walking with Jimmy last night had felt like a quest and today it's just another lovely California morning. But a lovely California morning before Zeppelin storm Pasadena, Robert reminds himself, is not an ordinary morning.

Robert suddenly wants it to be the four of them here, wants to play footie on the beach with John, while Jimmy and Jonesy watch them like city mice. And he also wants to be at the gig, doing the get in. He loves to walk on the stage before the sound checks and get a feel of the rake of it, he loves the intricacy and the mechanics of the Zeppelin machine with all its web of cables, egos, and arcane roadie rituals. He turns around to grin at Jimmy. But Jimmy is lost in his head again and only half smiles. He looks like he is searching for something among the pebbles. Distracted.

Robert watches the ocean. Jimmy is like the sea Robert feels, he ebbs and flows, but his pull is constant. The feel of Jimmy's hands on him remains but the urgency is gone. High tide. Low tide. Tension and release. Jimmy comes over and touches Robert lightly on the shoulder, holding something in his other hand.

Jimmy holds up a small stone to the sky and they both look through the hole that has worn through its center.

"Oh! you found a witch stone... lucky"

"Yes" Jimmy says in the voice he uses to explain the structure of a song, or the placing of a mic "so folklore says when you look through you can see into the faerie world…"

"Yeah" Robert agrees, unsure what Jimmy is getting at, what he's trying to tell him.

"and occult means hidden" Jimmy continues, looking at Robert directly now “The power comes from the being, not the explaining."

Robert sees a light flush in Jimmy's face, and he feels an ache for Jimmy that is new, not lust now, but something like compassion.

"That’s what I want for us…, uh, what I want for Zeppelin... you see?" Jimmy asks

Robert is not sure if he does, but he wants to learn from Jimmy, and so he listens.

"Just the music, people will come in their thousands, it's happening so fast now... you see? We don't need to explain ourselves" Jimmy says looking intently at Robert.

Looking for answers in his eyes.

And now Robert can hear both things Jimmy is saying.

Robert's left hand goes up to the scarf still tied round his throat, and he feels a crack in his heart like it's breaking to let a little light out.

"Ok, it's ok Pagey... I know. I know"

**Author's Note:**

> so...  
> work in progress but of course this is all in my head and I do not own Led Zeppelin or their fixation on English folklore. Is Jimmy tall enough to do the scene in chapter 1 on his knees? I'm not sure. Yes the dawn in California is at 6ish at the start of May. It really was a nearly full moon (two in the same month) IRL In 1969 LZ played Whisky-a-GoGo on the 30st of April then UC Irvine Crawford Hall on the 1st May so that was nice to give them a night off in my timeline, but I don't know if they were at the Hyatt this tour so their location is a bit vague. The gig in Irvine was notoriously oversold and LZ played with the doors open to let in as many people as possible, and it was a bit of a minor riot. Things I never though I needed to know: how does the dawn light look across sunset strip which runs east to west, and can you even see it from the good side of the Hyatt? The thing JP says to greet the sun is from Liber Resh vel Helios, the Thelema daily dawn prayer. I don't think he gets it right. Buck Gully is a real place but I don't know if you could really get to the beach. Robert is very Alex Logan ingenue in this fic. Come on lad, buck up! Washing your face in the Beltaine dew was a thing in England. I'm hoping it makes a comeback.


End file.
